Nicola Sturgeon

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Nicola Sturgeon

Post  Major on Wed Mar 22, 2017 12:37 pm

Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister's chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop. Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur : " You get out and check - you were driving." The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead. " You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, I can't afford to be blamed for anything. The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered, his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face. " My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola. The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of malt whisky, the wife gave me a slap up meal and the daughter made love to me." " What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola. I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon's chauffeur and I've just killed the cow."'
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Re: Nicola Sturgeon

Post  nicko on Wed Mar 22, 2017 1:38 pm

I like it !
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Re: Nicola Sturgeon

Post  wyatt1 on Thu Mar 23, 2017 2:03 am

@Major wrote:Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister's chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop. Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur : " You get out and check - you were driving." The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead. " You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, I can't afford to be blamed for anything. The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered, his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face. " My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola. The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of malt whisky, the wife gave me a slap up meal and the daughter made love to me." " What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola. I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon's chauffeur and I've just killed the cow."'
Grinning Grinning ROFL ROFL ROFL 

First Salmond ... now Sturgeon !!!  something fishy going on  scratch Suspect Twisted Evil Twisted Evil
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Re: Nicola Sturgeon

Post  Major on Thu Mar 23, 2017 10:23 am

@wyatt1 wrote:
Grinning Grinning ROFL ROFL ROFL 

First Salmond ... now Sturgeon !!!  something fishy going on  scratch Suspect Twisted Evil Twisted Evil



I see, ya giving me a 'haddock', only codding.
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Re: Nicola Sturgeon

Post  Major on Sat Mar 25, 2017 9:45 pm

Nicola Sturgeon is nicknamed 'The Poison Dwarf'.
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Re: Nicola Sturgeon

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