Hugh's Poo's

First topic message reminder :

In A Flap wrote:

feel free to post a diary, we can call it hugh's poo's.

You beat me to it.....

Day One:-

Anyway...one day in and no ill effects.


I'm treating this stuff must like Antabuse (if memory serves me well..not that I've ever been an alcoholic).This makes you ill if you consume alcohol. This XLS stuff (to me) is the same.
I don't want to have poos that could double up as a candle, nor do I wish to wear a big nappy (not in 'work time' anyway!)
So, my approach is to this is to make XLS 'force' me to cut out as much fat as possible in my daily diet.

One the bike (exercise) to burn off a supposed 100 calories, then another tonight.
I reckon that will take about 1/2hr each.....Sky One/News is on the PC (just love SKY GO!!)....what more do I need?

DurhamLad wrote:

Theyre more like hobbies Sir....

all sports are hobbies... unless you are paid for them..Sir

Hugh Jardon wrote:


..."I'm a mother of 4 kids. They are already adults but still I never find my best weight again.
I secretly tried one medicine, but it's not really my style. In
addition, my BMI is 27, so it's not really dramatic yet is it?
I've now been testing XL-S Medical Fat Binder for 5 months and my scale
shows that I've lost 4.75 kilos. What's more, I've had no undesirable
side effects!
It looks like it gives results, but patience is the key...." so says one fan of XLS.

http://www.xlsmedical.com/site/int

2lb a month eh?....... Mmmm..hardly a ringing endorsement is it?

tell me i just read that wrong

you can't be a woman

how the hell can you be a woman?

gelico wrote:

tell me i just read that wrong

you can't be a woman

how the hell can you be a woman?

Oh dear.....did you not spot the speech marks?

yep, I'm a bloke...a real bloke...not one of those metro-sexuals (though I do use Nivea with the cool skin razor) and not one of those 'men' who are friends of Dorothy.

Hugh Jardon wrote:

Oh dear.....did you not spot the speech marks?

yep, I'm a bloke...a real bloke...not one of those metro-sexuals (though I do use Nivea with the cool skin razor) and not one of those 'men' who are friends of Dorothy.

:shock: :shock: :shock:

what a relief!!! Soz, read through it too quickly

so anyways - you still pooing as you should be??

i read some story of a teacher who took medication to lose weight but was told specifically she would have very bad side effects if she ate anything fattening

she did eat some cake,,,,,she then had a very bad side effect,,,,,,she shat herself in class in front of all the kids apparantly



easy does it old boy!!

gelico wrote:

:shock: :shock: :shock:

what a relief!!! Soz, read through it too quickly

so anyways - you still pooing as you should be??

i read some story of a teacher who took medication to lose weight but was told specifically she would have very bad side effects if she ate anything fattening

she did eat some cake,,,,,she then had a very bad side effect,,,,,,she shat herself in class in front of all the kids apparantly



easy does it old boy!!

I'm fine...thanks for the concern...

...I've not had any toilet difficulties at all....in fact I've gone out of my way to eat stuff that 'supposedly' causes nasty poos!

I know of 2 people that have been on the 'lighter life' scheme...one has been really screwed up internally... the other just a bit.
Now, I cannot state that LL has caused this... but.....

I'm avoiding all carbs, where possible and have these tabs when I have a fry up.
I'm lost a stone, so far and have not starved myself one iota.

I've known of one teacher that cacked their pants in class...


.....after little johnny brought in a WW2 hand grenade for 'show and tell'!

Just had a 3 flushes and a swordfight....

Discuss.....

When my mum was in hospital last week after her head injury, I used the toilet in her room and on the back of the toilet door was a poo chart, outlining all the different poos and what they meant.
I stood there reading that chart for about ten minutes.

Seriously. What a waste of ten minutes.

Had I known, hughie, that you'd been having pooblems I'd have took a pic for you.

eddie wrote:When my mum was in hospital last week after her head injury, I used the toilet in her room and on the back of the toilet door was a poo chart, outlining all the different poos and what they meant.
I stood there reading that chart for about ten minutes.

Seriously. What a waste of ten minutes.

Had I known, hughie, that you'd been having pooblems I'd have took a pic for you.

That's just it...no toilet difficulties .....

Grapefruit after a full English breakfast, or try prune juice, that should clear any blockage.

scrat wrote:Grapefruit after a full English breakfast, or try prune juice, that should clear any blockage.

So...why does alla say that you are full of shit, Scrat?

My colons etc are quite clear and in no way clogged.

I don't eat full englishs' much...

Hugh Jardon wrote:


So...why does alla say that you are full of shit, Scrat?

My colons etc are quite clear and in no way clogged.

I don't eat full englishs' much...

If you want to shit stir then it's because he's a shitbag coward, nazi forum cheat, child rape fantasist and a spammer of paedo with children pics, he hates being outed I guess!!!

I try and have a full English a least once a week, I love black pudding, I was recently in the Black Country, damn fine English breakfast.

Quiche Lorraine is also an excellent breakfast.

scrat wrote:
If you want to shit stir then it's because he's a shitbag coward, nazi forum cheat, child rape fantasist and a spammer of paedo with children pics, he hates being outed I guess!!!

I try and have a full English a least once a week, I love black pudding, I was recently in the Black Country, damn fine English breakfast.

Quiche Lorraine is also an excellent breakfast.

 You neglected to say that  '' Black pudding '' was your boyfriend.

ALLAKAKA wrote:





 You neglected to say that  '' Black pudding '' was your boyfriend.

LMFAO

    

ALLAKAKA wrote:





 You neglected to say that  '' Black pudding '' was your boyfriend.

And why oh why did Scrat use the term " Black Country".....?

He could have simply said Nigeria... Unless he was being wacist.


( chortle).

scrat wrote:

Hugh Jardon wrote:


So...why does alla say that you are full of shit, Scrat?

My colons etc are quite clear and in no way clogged.

I don't eat full englishs' much...

If you want to shit stir then it's because he's a shitbag coward, nazi forum cheat, child rape fantasist and a spammer of paedo with children pics, he hates being outed I guess!!!

I try and have a full English a least once a week, I love black pudding, I was recently in the Black Country, damn fine English breakfast.

Quiche Lorraine is also an excellent breakfast.

I always understood real men don't each quiche

Flap Gallagher wrote:
I always understood real men don't each quiche

Even I didn't go for that open goal...

Flap Gallagher wrote:
I always understood real men don't each quiche

This poor chap neglected his dietary fibre...

Hugh!!!! FFS!!! I'm eating my onion ring crisps and click on here and see that??????
FFS!!! No!


Oh dean I am calling for that post to be deleted!!! It's made me sick!!

eddie wrote:Hugh!!!! FFS!!! I'm eating my onion ring crisps and click on here and see that??????
FFS!!! No!


Oh dean I am calling for that post to be deleted!!! It's made me sick!!

I agree, those socks are hideous.

Hugh Jardon wrote:


I agree, those socks are hideous.

You're a sick man hughie.
I feel for your poor wife.   

Hugh Jardon wrote:


This poor chap neglected his dietary fibre...

 Did Doug get out in the end ?

eddie wrote:

You're a sick man hughie.
I feel for your  poor wife.   

She loves me..and I her.... Eddie.

Believe it or not...whilst I am a very sick individual..I'm also a very jolly chappie.

She particularly liked my 

What's yellow and doesn't like liver? 
Joke.

Hugh Jardon wrote:


She loves me..and I her.... Eddie.

Believe it or not...whilst I am a very sick individual..I'm also a very jolly chappie.

She particularly liked my 

What's yellow and doesn't like liver? 
Joke.

I've no doubt hughie. Just don't show her your poos eh? There's only so much a lady can take.....


Okay, What's yellow and doesn't like liver? 

eddie wrote:

I've no doubt hughie. Just don't show her your poos eh? There's only so much a lady can take.....


Okay, What's yellow and doesn't like liver? 

    

eddie wrote:

I've no doubt hughie. Just don't show her your poos eh? There's only so much a lady can take.....


Okay, What's yellow and doesn't like liver? 

Ben Hardwick