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Post  Guest on Tue Aug 06, 2013 10:53 pm


Q: What do you do with 365 used condoms?



A: Melt them into a tyre and call it a Good Year.

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Post  wyatt1 on Wed Aug 07, 2013 5:04 pm

@Costa wrote:
Q: What do you do with 365 used condoms?



A: Melt them into a tyre and call it a Good Year.
 Hi, Costa.


 Q: How do you save a lawyer from drowning ?

A:   Shoot him in the head !!
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Post  Tess on Wed Aug 07, 2013 5:18 pm

50% of people think apathy is rife in Britain.

The other half don't really give a f**k
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Post  boomerang on Wed Aug 07, 2013 6:05 pm

On a night out at a restaurant with Dean he was heard to say,

"I'll get the bill."

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Post  Tess on Wed Aug 07, 2013 6:42 pm

Adrian Messenger wrote:On a night out at a restaurant with Dean he was heard to say,

"I'll get the bill."
... and Didge replied "are you suggesting I can't afford to pay for the meal? Is that because I'm black?"
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Post  wyatt1 on Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:49 pm

Q: What's the definition of diplomacy?

A: The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.
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Post  wyatt1 on Wed Aug 07, 2013 8:15 pm

British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray!
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Post  wyatt1 on Thu Aug 08, 2013 10:41 pm

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: 'I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.'
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Post  wyatt1 on Sat Aug 10, 2013 9:53 pm

@wyatt1 wrote:A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: 'I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.'
 War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
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Post  wyatt1 on Tue Aug 13, 2013 11:22 am

@wyatt1 wrote: War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
 Q:   What is a Myth ?


A:   A female Moth    !
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Post  wyatt1 on Sun Aug 18, 2013 12:13 pm

I bought a pond full of carp from eBay for £100,
big mistake, what a load of shit!
The seller was dyslexic.   surprise 
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Post  wyatt1 on Tue Oct 15, 2013 8:11 pm

20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs.
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Post  feelthelove on Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:18 pm

Did you hear about the two Blondes that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theater?

They went to see “Closed for Winter”.  Post your One liners No_sha12 ROFL 
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Post  wyatt1 on Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:23 pm

@feelthelove wrote:Did you hear about the two Blondes that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theater?

They went to see “Closed for Winter”.  Post your One liners No_sha12 ROFL 
4 and 20  virgins came down from Inverness .....   FACT!!!!   ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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Post  nicko on Tue Oct 15, 2013 10:39 pm

when they went home there were four and twenty
  less
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Post  gerber on Tue Oct 15, 2013 10:43 pm

@Tess wrote:... and Didge replied "are you suggesting I can't afford to pay for the meal? Is that because I'm black?"
Didge as always handed out knowlegable tips
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Post  feelthelove on Tue Oct 15, 2013 10:55 pm

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed?
A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep Post your One liners Sleep10 ROFL 
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Post  gerber on Tue Oct 15, 2013 10:57 pm

@feelthelove wrote:Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed?
A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep Post your One liners Sleep10 ROFL 
Missed you FTL
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Post  feelthelove on Tue Oct 15, 2013 11:02 pm

@gerber wrote:Missed you FTL
You too Gorgeous Gerber I love you Post your One liners Hug_411 xxx
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Post  wyatt1 on Thu Oct 17, 2013 11:36 am

Hummingbirds are just regular birds that don't know the words.
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Post  wyatt1 on Thu Oct 17, 2013 2:44 pm

@wyatt1 wrote:Hummingbirds are just regular birds that don't know the words.
Do spin-doctors finally disappear up their own ass.
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Post  wyatt1 on Tue Nov 12, 2013 10:21 am

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
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Post  Bert Assirati on Tue Nov 12, 2013 10:27 am

I never forget a face, but in your case I’d be glad to make an exception.

Said to Nems

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Post  wyatt1 on Tue Nov 12, 2013 10:45 am

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.


ps: Good Morning Ulrich


Last edited by wyatt1 on Tue Nov 12, 2013 10:51 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : ps)
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Post  Flap Zappa on Tue Nov 12, 2013 1:03 pm

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